A few weeks ago while welcoming a reader to the blog, she mentioned how the breast-feeding dilemma was so true except she felt another myth was worse... natural vs assisted childbirth... (yep strictly a mommy blog... those with timid hearts need linger no more!!! Hehehehehe!!!) ... I had sort of filed it away for.... like whenever ....since my recollection of the arrival of my daughter was pretty hazy at best... But then I saw this ad...and here I am boiling with righteous indignation... Get to the point you say? Well here goes...
First the ad: Attractive (who isn't, right?) 8-month preggie woman stretching near a beach. Still able to wear leggings without looking like an ad for an elephant in tights. And the blurb, " Learn about natural childbirth and delivery. Bring your baby into this world safely in the only way that is good for them... etc etc. etc" You get the picture... labour, screaming, babies emerging all good. Epidurals, painkillers, scalpels, forceps, baby emerging all bad (except last one but then the baby's screwed anyways so we can classify that as bad too).
Before I proceed, here's my disclaimer in place: I am not advocating one way over the other (same as the BF blog). I love it that we have choices to suit our bodies, our temperaments, our lives and within boundaries these are all choices to be explored to their fullest. But I strongly object to nonsensical, fairy-tale proportions of some myths that are mindlessly propagated without thought or consideration to other's feelings on the matter.
Being in this wonderful land of the free, we as first-time moms get fed a lot of information (which according to sources gets disseminated to public in unsuspecting countries too) . Like which is the best way to sleep, what to wear, what's best for the child .. when to burp the baby etc etc... And none is more insidious than the idea of natural childbirth...no medications, no painkillers, no forceps, and the biggest taboo in this new age hypothesis is the C-section...For first-time moms having the baby (sometimes unplanned) is the first time they are in completely uncharted waters. And if you come from society such as ours (traditional, Indian household) you've had very little discussion about what you're about to experience and will form the focus for the rest of your active life (retirement and evening years with hubby don't count in this). And so you read furtively at first and desperately towards the end, afraid of what might hit you in the second and third trimesters of your pregnancy.. if you're lucky enough to have friends (or sisters) who've been thru it you listen to freely handed advice and then you ultimately decide ... that natural is best... for, you want the best for your baby, don't you? And then all the reports on insecure C-section babies. C-section babies doomed to be on the fringes of life. More susceptible to physical illness and emotional problems they say (do they stalk the streets at night questioning every random drunk and druggie and would-be suicide-r whether they were born the right way?) . C-section babies it seems are cursed just by the thoughtless act of coming out a different way from other kids. And their mothers are to forever suffer the sin of neglect at that time of birth. And this guilt can make them think differently even when time is of the essence just so they don't let their child down and condemn them to a life of a ...what? A normal healthy child who probably grows up loving its parents just as much or as little as the baby who was born accompanying shrieking, mind-numbing cries from the pushing mom!!!?? Why do we let fads overcome good sense? And all of us do ... is it a protective motherly instinct that comes out in full force at inconvenient times in bizarre forms?
Seriously though, who funds these studies? More importantly why? Are they themselves insecure moms seeking absolution for their bad parenting skills on a process that most do because it woud save their child's lives? Don't they realize by constantly shoving this stuff in our faces, it only makes nervous moms even more worried that they may forever doom their child by the choice they make when they are coming out? As one of two fairly normal C-section kids (who had her child "naturally" by the ways) I feel uniquely positioned to comment. Children and their parents have enough to navigate through their lives and mistakes are constantly being made. Compared to parental neglect when the child is in the teens, the possibly life-saving decision for mother and child in the labour room must rank so much lower in a child's development. Do these thoughtless "study" proselytizers ever realize the havoc they play with moms' emotions who had a difficult decision to make at a very fragile time? So please stop it all, everybody. Babies are born and lives are led every day, everywhere. Some make smart decisions, some dumb but how a baby comes out of the womb is the last thing he or she will remember or care about when they're 30 and looking back. It's the stolen afternoons and the many cuddles and hugs and love (post the age of 8) that are most remembered. So C-section moms, fear not the woman who stretches so happily in her 8th month of pregnancy .. it's pretty likely she's going to have a C-section but doesn't know it yet!!!
First the ad: Attractive (who isn't, right?) 8-month preggie woman stretching near a beach. Still able to wear leggings without looking like an ad for an elephant in tights. And the blurb, " Learn about natural childbirth and delivery. Bring your baby into this world safely in the only way that is good for them... etc etc. etc" You get the picture... labour, screaming, babies emerging all good. Epidurals, painkillers, scalpels, forceps, baby emerging all bad (except last one but then the baby's screwed anyways so we can classify that as bad too).
Before I proceed, here's my disclaimer in place: I am not advocating one way over the other (same as the BF blog). I love it that we have choices to suit our bodies, our temperaments, our lives and within boundaries these are all choices to be explored to their fullest. But I strongly object to nonsensical, fairy-tale proportions of some myths that are mindlessly propagated without thought or consideration to other's feelings on the matter.
Being in this wonderful land of the free, we as first-time moms get fed a lot of information (which according to sources gets disseminated to public in unsuspecting countries too) . Like which is the best way to sleep, what to wear, what's best for the child .. when to burp the baby etc etc... And none is more insidious than the idea of natural childbirth...no medications, no painkillers, no forceps, and the biggest taboo in this new age hypothesis is the C-section...For first-time moms having the baby (sometimes unplanned) is the first time they are in completely uncharted waters. And if you come from society such as ours (traditional, Indian household) you've had very little discussion about what you're about to experience and will form the focus for the rest of your active life (retirement and evening years with hubby don't count in this). And so you read furtively at first and desperately towards the end, afraid of what might hit you in the second and third trimesters of your pregnancy.. if you're lucky enough to have friends (or sisters) who've been thru it you listen to freely handed advice and then you ultimately decide ... that natural is best... for, you want the best for your baby, don't you? And then all the reports on insecure C-section babies. C-section babies doomed to be on the fringes of life. More susceptible to physical illness and emotional problems they say (do they stalk the streets at night questioning every random drunk and druggie and would-be suicide-r whether they were born the right way?) . C-section babies it seems are cursed just by the thoughtless act of coming out a different way from other kids. And their mothers are to forever suffer the sin of neglect at that time of birth. And this guilt can make them think differently even when time is of the essence just so they don't let their child down and condemn them to a life of a ...what? A normal healthy child who probably grows up loving its parents just as much or as little as the baby who was born accompanying shrieking, mind-numbing cries from the pushing mom!!!?? Why do we let fads overcome good sense? And all of us do ... is it a protective motherly instinct that comes out in full force at inconvenient times in bizarre forms?
Seriously though, who funds these studies? More importantly why? Are they themselves insecure moms seeking absolution for their bad parenting skills on a process that most do because it woud save their child's lives? Don't they realize by constantly shoving this stuff in our faces, it only makes nervous moms even more worried that they may forever doom their child by the choice they make when they are coming out? As one of two fairly normal C-section kids (who had her child "naturally" by the ways) I feel uniquely positioned to comment. Children and their parents have enough to navigate through their lives and mistakes are constantly being made. Compared to parental neglect when the child is in the teens, the possibly life-saving decision for mother and child in the labour room must rank so much lower in a child's development. Do these thoughtless "study" proselytizers ever realize the havoc they play with moms' emotions who had a difficult decision to make at a very fragile time? So please stop it all, everybody. Babies are born and lives are led every day, everywhere. Some make smart decisions, some dumb but how a baby comes out of the womb is the last thing he or she will remember or care about when they're 30 and looking back. It's the stolen afternoons and the many cuddles and hugs and love (post the age of 8) that are most remembered. So C-section moms, fear not the woman who stretches so happily in her 8th month of pregnancy .. it's pretty likely she's going to have a C-section but doesn't know it yet!!!
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