Skip to main content

For Dad-before Father's day

Random Thoughts
Another Hallmark holiday looms ahead : Father's day. The sop to the poor left-out halves of parenting just so that Mother's day doesn't look biased or anything. Because surely we must encourage all the poor dads who're just waiting or appeciation? But here's the thing-I don't think so... Moms ? Sure they love all the fuss and frippery, the gifts, the reiterations of "I love you," the cutesy things that families are supposed to do... Dads on the other hand are quite happy to come home to happy families, to kids who're doing their own thing and happy about it and general peace in their little slice of the world. They don't care do they whether we give them the best gift to mark a day? Cos surely if they wanted it they would just go out and buy it for themselves. That's what makes them dads...not moms who wait for someone to notice they want something and then buy it for them when they're not looking. And then feel bad if someone doesn't. Dads are so much fun!!!
So here's my paean to dads all over (I am not sending a card nor am I buying a gift... he won't even know why... he's lucky he remembers his own birthday and that we do... sometimes): Dads are what balance out paranoid first-time moms (like myself). Dads are the ones who will cheerfully toss a toddler into the air without wondering if they will miss her by a hair's breadth on her way down. Dads are those who fall in love only once in their lives... with their very first-born daughters (it's true... there's a bias ... just own up to it!!!)!!! Dads are those who remember the small things in life... a funny word their kids say, a stolen afternoon together with the family... Dads are the ones who teach you their music and show you their lives as they knew it when they were young boys. Dads are the strong, silent types who recite poetry to their family ... that they wrote themselves!!! Dads are the ones who repeat the same joke for a lifetime (cos now it's a family joke!!! Still boring...) ....Dads are those who think it's all right to dream and help you not to lose your way while finding yours. Dads are the ones who give you ideals, help you learn to spell, confound you while trying to teach you mathematics (or chemistry or driving a car). Dads teach you to go to work every day sometimes only because you have to for the sake of someone else. Dads teach you that life and love are sometimes the same thing. Dads are the ones who'll put a blanket on you when you fall asleep studying. Dads are those who want you to be better than themselves ... and when you think you are, pull you down a bit (it's healthy to be humble)!!!
Dads are the ones we avoid from the age of 10... neither talking to nor granting them the importance they once enjoyed ....while we try to find our muddled way and they stand helplessly by. Dads are the ones we appreciate at the age of 30 for teaching you to be true to yourself and the rest of the world. Dads we appreciate when they're not around to help us make decisions anymore...for their wisdom and their love ... for caring enough to let us be ourselves... Thank you dads!!! ...We love you!!!

Comments

Inkk said…
Lovely post. Reminded me so much of my own dear doofus dad! What’s it with Dads and daughters?? Such an unspoken bond unlike Mums and daughters. Dads always seem to be on the periphery, yet are so deeply connected - they know without being told, silently watch you grow from innocent, yet naughty girls who brought the house down into women, coming to terms with the myriad aspects that feminity brings with it, struggling to come to terms with it themselves, because when they see you, they still see the child in you - the child they put pigtails for, took to school, brought back home from best friend’s birthday parties, advised on career decisions – the little girl they watched fall in love, grow up, and now…like in your case, have little precious girls of their own. So different from Mums and Daughters… but then, who am I speaking to :)) !! Hope you enjoy, treasure and re-capture every little moment with your precious little one……someday, she will might probably be writing a blog about you :))
The Wag said…
Thanks inkognito... I know I spend most of time arguing with my dad and disregarding his express wishes... but over time I find it's the lessons he taught while not teaching that have stayed with me and that I now unconsciously or consciously try to imitate!! I think, of all the people in the world, they are the ones who still see you as a person who should achieve the maximum that their potential will allow without thinking about other aspects like motherhood (in my case) or wifehood or anything else except me and my brain!!! Oh well... here's to them...

Popular posts from this blog

New Beginnings

So D-Poo has started at another daycare... all supposed pluses... at the university with hopefully like-minded people...very close to me... dubious advantage, I get to do drop-off and pick-up.. but on the other hand it may build closeness...or else I will damage her psyche forever by throwing out her favourite very annoying CD from the car...She's been very happy though and considerably less dirty at the end of the day which leaves me wondering why I didn't move her sooner... The visit to India of course has passed from her mind except for some ladder-climbing incidents and other random recollections of P-Boy cousin. But some effects we still fondly hope are true and long-lasting... like her attempts to insert more Tamil words into her vocabulary (she mostly sounds like a echo whe we speak but I'll take anything)...I fancy that her tolerance of spicy food has increased (false but I'm a deluded mom...gimme a break here...)...She still has no concept of tradition as I wou

To work or not to work

Well this blog is developing as a "mommy" blog as a certain reader commented and somehow I am not able to stem the flow... It's just easy to write about stuff that occupies your mind everyday than to worry about Lebanon (Altho' I have to admit, I am particularly touched by this conflict given that Mid Eastern conflicts have been going on for the best part of my lifetime...) I was reading a blog entry by Rashmi Bansal (Yes sissy, I use sites you've listed and like most of them)... Made for interesting reading on the matrimonial ads in newspapers...Now I have long perused these very ads and found them in varying degrees funny, tolerable and downright abominable...I read her rather funny account of all the various types of women listed by type and degree of wanting to work after marriage... Unfortunately there isn't any real manual to predict what we're going to be in life and the baby curveball is truly something unexpected. Me for example: Those who knew me

Get off my breast!!

No, it isn't a continuation of the theme that darling Sissy started ... it's just a response to an article I read on CNN... and ad nauseam on every parenting site, health site, news site, TV ... the list goes on. The current objects of my fury are called apparently "lactivists"... an "empowering" term for annoying people who like to shove their superiority as breast-feeding mothers in everyone's face!!! No, I'm all for it... if you can do it go for it... it's functional, free and most sanitary and billions of people have flourished doing the thing... most intelligent cultures (which automatically excludes all white, caucasian cultures) have recognized this for eons and it's just fine. These sensible cultures aso have had the benefit of being poor and recognize that a full belly is the prerequisite and not what an aging hyper protective mother thinks is a baby's birthright!!!! So what evolved was a commonsense approach to feeding a child..